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Only when it burns, you realize who really Who will jump into the fire.

You look in the mirror, the eyes fill with tears, and you yourself will be absolutely furious. To itself. Has been drawn in recent months, years go so long. It has changed, life has changed. With ups and downs.

But now that I look so in the mirror, I would like nothing more than to throw something hard against it, so that the mirror shatters into 239 423 small pieces and I can ram me every splinter in the skin .

Because I have such a rage at me. Fear of the future.

My life is so out of control. I have nothing more in control and .. just know further.

I have only a few people with whom I can talk about everything

and not even where I can safely say that tomorrow the world does not know what I'm thinking.

I long to me again to meet with friends, laugh, take pictures and .. walk. You know what I mean. What good friends do be it.

Man himself has no control. One hyperventilating because you bake it not simply gets. It's like a curse that hovers over one.

never anything to be good. Never.

This hope I have given up.

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Sometimes I wish we had never met.

We never talked.

never done anything.

never laughed together.
AND never become friends.
Because it hurts me to see you,

to talk with you and vorzuheucheln an ideal world.
But the truth, I must tell you.
I doubt our friendship and all things we have ever joined.

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Love you till the end ..

PS I Love You ♥

I just want to see you

when you are all alone

I just want to catch you If I can

I just want to be there

when the morning light explodes

On your face it radiates

I can not escape

I love you till the end ..

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power's fun to break your heart?

people doing everything we can
that people who love to go their separate ways,
or are not even together,
're the ultimate, right?
I do think
especially, who are good friends,
perhaps the best
which it breaks my heart.
Why? What has it?
Nu because no one would collect himself,
you have to make others unhappy?

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favorite movie quote ♥

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love Anna.
I am writing this letter from Rebbe, we find our first 2 years ago and unfortunately have spent a single holiday.
Up to Stetin I am using the train, and then I'm getremmt and even the railroad tracks and I have long wandered the rest of the trip I made with the old boat.
Just as we did ..
And now I sit here by the sea and ask me why I did it all done.
the time I was so incredibly happy that I did not know where, with all the butterflies in my stomach.
And I never thought that this would go out with us, so ..
I think of nothing but you on and on all 'the dreams I had, who can no longer meet because I was such a stupid idiot ..
I know very well that I have the same shit as you've built!
why who did what and whether with or without feelings ultimately does not matter.
I know I have done you very much.
And that makes me very sad ..
You have me asked if I forgive you and I said 'So is not that simple!'
It is so easy when you swallow his stupid male pride.
And I do now. And if I still doing that because there is no anger.
But, but .. just ..
infinite emptiness and sadness.
Anna I do not know what to do ..
I miss you so much ..
I miss your smell.
I miss your skin.
I miss your laugh.
Your puffy eyes when you wake up in the morning.
I know that I was often inattentive.
But not because I have loved you any more, but .. but simply because I was so stupid to believe that we will stay together forever anyway ..
Anna .. I will not be exposed to an ice floe.
would I want to grow old.
.. And I would like to feed ducks.
and that they prefer to you!
I know I'm gone ..
but I wish so much
komen that I must return!
I can not be without you, Anna.
I want to come back home ..
Yes, I love you.
I love you always!

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music. ♥

you know what I sometimes think?

It would Music always be there.

In everything you do.

And when shit really is

is then at least have the music there.

And to the point where it is most beautiful,

because the record would jump

and you hear only this one moment.

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expectations.

We think all

we be something very great .

And we feel us a little robbed as ,

if not rfüllen our expectations e .

But sometimes we are our expectations ahead.

's what you expect faded completely ,

addition to what we do not expect .

You have to have miracles ,

why we cling to our expectations .

The Expected is that

what is keeping us in the balance .

upright. Still.

What we expect just the beginning.

What we expect not

is that what changed our lives.

________________________________________

Heute genau 8 Monate schon (:  

Ich Liebe dich ♥

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

  Ein & Alles *-*

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moment of happiness. ♥

Mir wurde die Frage gestellt, welcher mein perfekter Glücksmoment wäre. Vielleicht ein Moment, in dem ich befreit von all' meinen Gedanken bin. Die Klarheit spüre, die in meinem Kopf herrscht. Ein Moment, der meine positiven Gefühle als Quelle für sich bestimmt und jedes Negative in die Luft wirft, ohne dass es erneut auf mich niederprasselt. Wenn die Vergangenheit in Vergessenheit geraten und die Zukunft greifbar nahe ist. Vielleicht ein Moment, in welchem ich Glück und Freiheit ein zu atmen scheine, davon lebe. Der die Kälte aus meinem Körper treibt und endlose Wärme hinterlässt. Wenn die kleinen Dinge, die glücklich machen, zu unendlich großen werden und Probleme ein Synonym sind, welches ich nicht kenne. Ein Moment, der vom Perfektionismus ernährt zu werden scheint und not faded, if everything else takes his end. A moment that blurs all boundaries and even the most minute object of war by both sides shaking hands with peace brings to a halt. If the feeling is present, clouds feel, taste the air and water to eat.

However, one should 'perfect', 'happiness' and 'moment' is not present in context. There is nothing perfect in this world is transient and happiness. Such moments make themselves into something that is not transient, as long as the idea to hold on to it and it always is the possibility to remember.

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Das habe ich in verschiedene Blog's ( ka, was die mehrzahl von Blog ist ) gefunden , wie z.B. http://peaseloveharmony.blogspot.com/   &   http://erinnerungenwiediese.blogspot.com/

Ich fand's irgendwie gut  & dies ist meine Version :

A wie Alex, den ich über alles Liebe ♥

B wie Baum, weil wegen Baum halt.

C wie Caro, meine süüße ♥

D wie Dummheit, von der ich viel besitze. ;D

E wie Eigene Persöhnlichkeit, die jeder haben sollte.

F wie Freunde, die besten habe ich *-*

G wie Großartig, meine große Familie,meistens.

H wie Hunde, meiner heißt Scharik. :)

I wie Indien, wo Moumita herkommt.

J wie Jannik & Jana,wie wichtig ihr mir doch seid ! ♥

K wie Katzen, meine heißt Fritz! : D

L like laugh that I often do, with my friends.

M like my world, it is stained.

N like chocolate walnut, I love :)

O like Grandma, I'm the best.

P as Papa-child, I am one.

Q like jellyfish, of which I'm very afraid, x

R like Regina, my sister.

S such as beach, I love beaches *-*

T such as grief, she is part of life. Sorry.

U inability, I am when it comes to showing emotions.

V like birds, they often annoy me.

W like Why? A word I often use.

X like X-mas, what to celebrate with the family.

Y such as YouTube, where I occasionally upload videos.

Z such cooperation. You & Me. Alex, I love you! *

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seen: you.
is: nothing good.
smelled: eating.
happy: not really .
annoyed: my inability to show my feelings.
hoped: that the past catches up with me.
cried: yes, too.
laugh: do not know. I do not think so. Or einbisschen yet.
ate: pasta with indefinable.
drink: Chocolate Cappuccino damn lonely.
desired: to finally know me, what I want.
viewed: facebook. often.
dreamed of a beautiful time. The will probably never.
thought, I should find out finally what I want!

shitty. god damn shitty.

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So tell me, where's the 'good' in 'goodbye ?

split up. Probably.
But she's afraid it would not be fair to us, "she says.
But always the dispute, and we will make it not very easy ..
It is a good person, too good ..
you fight. Fight against the pain.
It is at the nerve ending, but it is fighting. Fight for U.S..
And we, we make it even more difficult.
us always tries to do everything right,
but we do not respect them.
We are selfish. Or? Yes, probably.

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14th February. A day that was invented by flower sellers and manufacturers of chocolates to once a year to increase their sales. A day on which all couples have loved ones terribly. How unnecessary!

is jealousy sucks.
Needless something.
Or?

I do not like.
I also continue to be extremely jealous too quickly.
Every damn.
Eine schlechte Eigenschaft von mir.
 

Wenn ich eifersüchtig bin, fühle ich mich

überflüssigerweise auch ungeliebt.
Und zwar von jedem.

Aber eigentlich weiß ich,
dass es nicht so ist.
Eigentlich. Oder?

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Es tut so unglaublich weh, so behandelt zu werden. Womit hab ich das verdient? Wieso geben mir meine Eltern das Gefühl, nichts wert zu sein? Ich meine, vielleicht bin ich das also .. but even if it should be so, why?

course I have faults. And what for whom. But it makes me equally worthless? I am .. really so?
What have other people who are accepted, which I do not have?

Sometimes my parents try to be funny. Then they look at me and I am forced to laugh. If I did not do that, it says again, "Oh man. Angela has a bad mood again, best not talk to her. "Of course. Ignore me. Just because I think your Superduperwitze not funny? Then I got right back in a bad mood? Achso. Here, if a
has constant bad mood, that's probably my father. My father is never there. So he's already there. Sorry. But I see him as good as ever.
My mother .. gives their best. My mother is much too good-natured, yet it fails. No one here really gives me the feeling of love. Affection, or whatever else usually goes with it. It sounds likely to like I would suffer from lack of attention to .. but that is what it is the truth. Believe it or not.

friends also are not what they used to be, right?
tell you, they report .. do not. Also cool. Friends who say they would be really important. But then one is only good enough if they need help or whatever.
But if I'd like to talk with them, I am interrupted promptly, then I am silent and .. already the subject is changed. Then I'm also tired of talking. Yes apparently not interested.

I'm not important.
I know.

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Feels like fallin 'into Nothing to say.

A heart can suffer thousands of fractures, by itself it does not stop beating. Despite all the pain one is alive.
Yes, you live. However, the word "live" at some point only the body. is life when you feel, laugh, cry, crazy things dare dream of, and does everything to ensure that those dreams come true.
After several breaks in the heart you're dead does not feel Man, forcing smiles and dreams that one has to appear an absurd. It works reasonably at work or at school, but if you're at home, you sit there stiff and looks into the void. In the white, bright, frightening void, in which one has fallen. Those who schonmal lost in it, knows that there are outputs. But ist man so sehr geblendet, dass es eine lange Suche nach ihnen verlangt. Man irrt im Nichts umher. Hat man den Ausgang gefunden, kehren langsam die Gefühle zurück, die Augen erscheinen einem nicht mehr matt. Man sieht die Welt wieder. Doch Gefühle sind einem fremd geworden. Wie ein scheues Reh tastet man sich vorsichtig an sie heran, schreckt einige Male zurück, aus Angst, sie könnten einen wieder fallen lassen.

Ich lebe. Fühle, lache, weine, träume. Doch all das nahe am Abrund. Das Gefühl, richtig zu leben, ist noch weit entfernt. Es befindet sich irgendwo in der sicheren Mitte, weit entfernt von der Klippe. Irgendetwas sagt mir, dass ich momentan nur zusammen mit dir die Mitte erreichen kann. And I hope you takes it one day my hand and show me to her.

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all, I would have changed me, but nobody asks why.

you want to blame me,

because I have changed?

I know

I am no longer,

I once was.

But

You've also changed!

Jo main thing is, the server does not take my pictures!

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♥ Perfect two.

You can be the peanut butter to my jelly .
You can be the butterflies I feel in my belly .
You can be the captain and I can be your first mate .
You can be the chills that I feel on our first date .

You can be the hero and I can be your side kick .
You can be the tear that I cry if we ever split .
You can be the rain from the cloud when it's stormin' .

Or you can be the sun when it shines in the mornin' .

Don't know if I could ever be ,
Without you cause boy you complete me .
And in time I know that we'll both see ,
That we're all we need .

Cause you're the apple to my pie .
You're the straw to my berry .
You're the smoke to my high .

And you're the one I wanna marry .
'Cause you're the one for me.

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